Know Your Stars: Kamichama Karin style!
by da Panda
Summary: Recipe: One mysterious voice...one teaspoon of a crazy author studio worker...a dash of random events...a comical cup of torture...and slices of a Kamichama Karin character sprinkled with the unknown...NO FLAMEYS! Chapter 5 is up for reading! FINALLY!
1. Karin

_**Hey! You're probably thinking "WTF? You already made a KK story!" Well, my lucky number is 26 and I just hafta get to 26! Stupid excuse? Whateva…let's get on with da story already, shall we?**_

_**-Panda**_

**Know your stars: Kamichama Karin style!**

**Chapter 1- victim, Karin!**

Karin stepped into a dark room with a spotlight on a chair. She looked pretty nervous but she sat down in it anyway. She looked nervous, puzzled, and impatient because for puzzled and impatient, she had no idea why she was doing here. And the impatient was because she had to go home and train her goddess powers.

"_Know your stars…know your stars…know your stars…" _A sudden voice appeared, Karin about to prepare her ring, but she didn't transform yet.

"Who said that?"

"_Karin…has awful grades…"_

"So what? I don't give a poo!"

"_Karin…gets awful grades because she imagines Kazune doing the electric slide…"_

"What?! I do not! That sexist pig would never appear in my mind!"

"_Karin…has a crappy spell…"_

"Hey! What's wrong with GODDESS THUNDER?!"

"_Karin…looks like Pippi Longstockings in volume 3 of this awesome manga in the bonus story one…"_

"It wasn't my turn to do the laundry! It was the only outfit I had that day!"

"_Karin…secretly is in love with Kakashi Hatake…"_

"Kakashi who…?!" Karin looked very confused, desperate for some kind of answer to a simple question. I came up with a bunch of Kakashi fan girls behind me and we all had swords.

"You…will…not…be…in…love…with…my…boyfriend!!!" I shouted with glaring red eyes.

"I don't know who he is!" Karin screamed, transforming into her goddess form and shouting out "I AM GOD!!"

"Oh…we'll hit you with gum wrappers!" We all threw gum wrappers at Karin and left at the back exit.

"_Karin…thinks Miyon is from Saudi Arabia…"_

"No way, she's from Korea! She told me that in volume two!" Miyon came on and said cruel things like "You monkey brain!" in Korean to Karin. But, of course, Karin and even the mysterious voice had no clue what she was saying at all. Miyon finally left at the back exit as well.

"Are you quite finished yet?" Karin grew more impatient, still in her goddess form.

"_If you want a big whammy, here it is! Karin…secretly saw Michiru singing rap songs and joined him!"_

"I would never participate in anything with Micchi!!! KYAAAAAAA!" Karin attacked with her Goddess Thunder attack and the cameras went black, only one survived, a little static-y from it falling, and we saw Karin stomp away to the back exit and slammed the door behind her.

"Um…now you know Karin…"

**Chapters coming soon from da Panda!**

**2- Kazune**

**3- Himeka**

**4- Kirio**

**5- Kirika**

**6- Michiru**

**7- Shi-chan**

**8- Miyon**

**9- Yuuki**

**And more!!!**

**See you then!**

**-Panda**


	2. Kazune

**Chapter 2- victim, Kazune!**

Kazune was afraid to see Karin go berserk after coming out of the dark and mysterious room, but he managed to open the handle and went into the room and sat on the chair.

"_Know your stars…know your stars…know your stars…"_

"What on earth was that?"

"_Kazune…wears a dress in battle mode…"_

"A dress…?! You're an idiot! It's not a dress!"

"_Well then, what is it?"_

"Um…I really don't know…"

"_Kazune…wears a pink apron when he cooks meals…"_

"What's wrong with that…I mean, what are you talking about?!"

"_Heh…caught you there; magic boy…Kazune…is really Vincent Valentine from Final fantasy VII…"_

"Who…?" Kazune asked confused. A stampede of fan girls came in saying "WHERE?!" trying to find their Vincent boy, trampling over Kazune. Kazune twitched three times then a few more then finally got up and sat down in the chair again.

"_Kazune…draws pictures of pretty ponies…"_

"PRETTY PONIES?!" Kazune was ticked, then a My Little Pony character came up with a sketch pad.

"Draw me next, Kazune-kun!" The pony said smiling.

"Uh…maybe Saturday, eleven o'clock…"

"Fine, if I'm not very busy that day…" The pony packed up her sketching gear and made her way to the back exit.

"_Kazune…sings 'Since U been gone' when he's said to be researching in the library…"_

"Since U been gone?! Is that really the best you can do?" Kazune looked ticked even more.

"_How about these apples…! Kazune…does ballet practice with Sasuke Uchiha from Naruto…"_

"Sasuke…!" Kazune looked pretty shocked instead of mad or saying things to convince the voice that it was all a lie. The entrance door opened in an instant and Sasuke appeared, handing him a pink tutu.

"You told me you wouldn't tell anyone!" Sasuke ran out to the exit, embarrassed, and Kazune tried to stop him.

"But, we need to finish the Swan Lake production!"

"_Heh…heh…Swan Lake…"_

"I won't give in; you're probably that coward Kirio Karasuma in disguise, trying to humiliate me!"

"…"

"Eh, is it really true after all?" Kazune lowered his anger, approving himself of his smartness of revealing the voice's true identity.

"_Yes, I am Kirio Karasuma in disguise. I just wanted to be a nice guy for once, going out to Starbucks every Tuesday at 8:30 A.M, getting the pomegranate shake and the freshly baked chocolate chip cookie to the side, you see Kazune-kun, I don't want to be the evil Mr. Glasses Man guy in every battle…so, I am Kirio…"_

"Really?"

"_No…so sit back down!" _Kazune sat back down in sadness, not figuring out the identity after all.

"_You're annoying me; punk…Kazune…watches the new episodes of Gilmore Girls before he goes to sleep…"_

"I CAN'T STAND ANOTHER WORD YOU SAY! APOLLO!" Kazune transforms into his god mode and looked prepared to battle.

"_The dress is revealed in this chapter after all…" _The voice snickered.

"SHUT UP!!" Kazune ran towards the cameras, but halted when a TV popped up out of no where with the new episode of Gilmore Girls. A fishing hook was attached to the antenna of the television set.

"MUST…SEE…EPISODE…" Kazune rushed out the back exit, following the TV, and the door closed. Panda, myself, unattached the hook and threw it away.

"That was a close one…" I sighed in relief.

"_Tell me about it…"_

"Do you really go to Starbucks at—?"

"_No…"_

**Next chapter, Himeka, then after Himeka, Kirio!**


	3. Himeka

**Chapter 3- victim, Himeka!**

Himeka was next to appear in the dark room, spotlighting on chair, and she sat down. She looked around her surroundings and saw a moth.

"Ooh, a mothy moth!" Himeka was about to stand up from the chair, but a sudden voice startled her and forced her to sit back down again.

"_Know your stars…know your stars…know your stars…"_

"Ooh, an echo!"

"_Himeka…thinks her homeroom teacher is a robot…"_

"What does this have to do with my homeroom teacher?" Himeka questioned, confused and not knowing the process of the torturing room.

"_Himeka…has been going out with rainbow chickens…"_

"How can I date chickens, though?"

"_Well, that's your problem…Himeka…sings Shakira songs…"_

"No I do not!" Himeka shouted, finally understanding the process of the game now.

"_She's catching on…finally…Himeka…is the cousin, fifty times removed, of Gaara…"_

"Who are you speaking of?" Himeka questioned again. Gaara appeared and stared at Himeka.

"No…she's a kawaii innocent character…no such thing in the sand village…except me, of course…" Gaara smiled as he looked at himself in a mirror, fan girls behind him squealing everywhere.

"Um, I don't think he's my cousin anymore…" Himeka looked at the fan girls drag him outside loudly.

"_Good, they're gone…back to business…Himeka…thinks Gendo Ikari from Neon Genesis Evangelion is a hottie…"_

"I do not even know who you're talking about! AGAIN…!" Himeka squealed. Gendo appeared and smiled as he raised his eyebrows.

"Chuck E Cheeses, tonight at 6:00?" Gendo asked, walking closer to Himeka.

"But, I'm busy, tonight is the night of the firefly catching festival!" Himeka made up something incredibly weird like that.

"I understand…call me!" Gendo handed Himeka a red note with his cell phone number and he raised his eye brows one last time before retreating to the back exit.

"_Can we please continue?"_

"Sure thing, mister echo man!" Himeka said throwing away the love cell phone number.

"_That guy was kind of creeping me out; too…anyway…Himeka…talks to herself in class…"_

"Oh dear, you're really starting to anger me!" Himeka said with angry eyes. She decided to pick up the chair that she was sitting in.

"Back, fiends, back! Himeka will destroy you!" Himeka said ferociously.

"_Oooh, a chair, scaaaaaaaaaaaary, Himeka, scaaaaaaaaaaaary."_

"GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Himeka threw the chair at the camera, it had gray and white static all across it.

"Um…the cameras are having technical difficulties…it seems…" said da Panda as she looked at the dead camera.

"_Now you know…Himeka Kujyou…"_

"Well, you know her dark side, actually…" da Panda sweatdropped.

**Meanwhile, outside…**

"Himeka, what's the matter?" Karin asked.

"Let's just say that things didn't go too well in that room…" Himeka said with a cheesy smile on her face.

_My god, everyone else is gonna die…_Karin and Kazune-kun both thought.

**To be continued…**

**Next chapter is Kirio Karasuma!!!**


	4. Kirio

**Chapter 4: victim, Kirio!**

Kirio Karasuma was impatient and not in the best mood today, almost like everyday pretty much, and rolled his eyes as he sat in the chair on the spotlight and folded his arms.

"Make this quick, now, I'm not in the best mood today and I need to stamp more papers…" Kirio said through clenched teeth.

"_Know your stars…know your stars…know your stars…" _Kirio didn't even bother to look around him in the darkness or ask who was speaking.

"_Er…hello…anyone there…?"_

"For Hades' sake, yes, I'm here, smart one!"

"_Someone has a bee in their boxers…Kirio…eats worms when he is bored…"_

"What is the meaning of this?" Kirio stood up angrily.

"Yo, Mr. Karasuma, sit down!" I said coming up to calm the evil Mr. Glasses man. He sighed unpleasantly and sat back down after a long pause.

"Continue with your idiotic games…"

"_Kirio…is afraid of the dark…"_

"Quite the contrary, you idiot…" Kirio said angrily but sat still. Suddenly, Kirio noticed that the chair he was sitting in was half-broken.

"Crap, we forgot to change the chair!" I said shocked. Men from the studios clumsily got out a new chair before the old chair would tilt any further.

"Why is this broken?" Kirio said pointing to the old chair get carried off by two guys with a crap load of dragon tattoos on their arms and backs.

"_Exactly what I was getting to next…Kirio…breaks chairs with his butt…"_

"You little son of a—"

"Mitch, I thought you got fired last week!!" I said as I saw the former studio worker.

"I came back to get a souvenir, a memory of my previous job!" Mitch said.

"You're crazy, man; get out of here, now!"

"No, hand me that camera then I'll leave!" Mitch whined.

"No way, we're using it! We're kind of busy! Go home, get some popcorn and a diet Pepsi, sit on the sofa, and watch Weakest Link!" I said preparing my kunai knives for a kill.

"Hand me it, now!" Mitch grabbed the camera, and we fought over it for a good two minutes and thirty-seven seconds, but I came out triumphant…we never saw Mitch again…and it's none of your business why… (**A/N **I don't know anyone named Mitch…FYI…)

"Continue, please…"

"_Where was I…ah, yes…Kirio…talks to rabid bunnies…"_

"Why are you telling disgraceful lies about me?" Kirio stood up and sliced the chair into two with his sword as he transformed.

"_Kirio…breaks innocent chairs…"_

"Innocent…?! You foolish mysterious sick-minded sonofa—"

"Stitch, you mean that blue alien?" I asked one of the studio members. "Sorry, continue, Kirio…"

"You're possessed, smoking crack, and drinking too much caffeine, that's why you're so ridiculous, you dumb—"

"Donkey!! Donkey parade outside!" I said, but everyone glared at me as I slipped into a random ditch and watched Weakest Link, like what Mitch was supposed to do…

"_Kirio…needs happy pills…"_

"That's it…you little—!" Kirio struck his sword, but the attack was interrupted by an explosion through the wall. There was Kazune and Karin…and Himeka, too…

"What do you want now?" Kirio groaned.

"We've come to fight you, Mr. Glasses man!" Karin said as she was about to say "God Thunder" upon him.

"I surrender, goodbye…" Kirio ran out of where Kazune, Karin, and Himeka entered and never looked back again.

"Um…now what?" Kazune asked.

"I…need…to…kill…something…" Himeka said through clenched teeth as her angry red eyes turned to the studio members. They all twitched in fear as Himeka slowly stepped up closer.

"Are you sure she isn't that girl from "The Ring"?" A cameraman asked nervously. Everyone was too afraid to answer.

"I have something you can attack…" I said raising my hand bravely out of the ditch as a commercial about a vacuum cleaner played. Himeka turned to the ditch.

"Yes…?" Himeka said sweetly, now with her regular, happy expression. Everyone sighed in relief.

"In that closet, there's a large black garbage bag, near the broom stick, can't miss it…" I pointed to the closet, now a little relaxed.

"Arigato…" Himeka bowed and had flaring red eyes again and walked towards the closet. She found the black bag, labeled on their "Mitch"…

**To be continued in chapter five…**

**Next chappy is Kirika, then after the torture of Kirika is either Shi-chan or Michiru Nishikiori! (I love that last name! lol!)**


	5. Kirika

_**Dear Readers,**_

_**Sorry for the slow update! I have good news and bad news for everyone…**_

_**Good News, I have finally updated! And chapters will be longer!**_

_**Bad News, Unfortunately, chapter updates will be slower and will take about a month or longer due to school's demonic tortures (AKA, homework and studying)**_

_**I have more news. **_

_**I have TWO NEW KAMICHAMA KARIN STORIES!**_

**_We Know All!_**

**This is your only chance to ask ANY Kamichama Karin character ANYTHING appropriate for teens and under. **

**_The Black Ring_**

**A random story crossover between Kamichama Karin and Nightmare Before Christmas. Pretty weird, eh? **

**Please check them out. And also, there is a special Kamichama Karin announcement on my profile. Hint, it has something to do with getting more Kamichama Karin stories on and making it snappier!**

**Okay, let's start the story finally!**

**Truly,**

**da Panda (Panda-Chan)**

**Know Your Stars: Kamichama Karin Style!**

**Chapter Five: Kirika Karasuma**

**-**

Kirika was next on the list for torture time. She sat in the brand-new chair on the spotlight. There was silence for a long time…Kirika waited…and waited…and waited…

"Um, hello there? Anyone here?" She asked.

"Dude, you're up!" I said to the voice.

"_Oh Crap! Um…"_

"Uh? Hello?"

_"Know your stars…know your stars…know your stars!"_

"Um…thank you very much for responding?"

"_Kirika…is a cross dresser_" 

"What? Well, I was pretending to be a boy, but it's not like I could disagree with Koge-Donbo!"

"_Kirika…is in Special Ed."_

"I'm not in Special Ed!"

"_Kirika…is the worst student…in Special Ed…"_

"I just told you before, I don't have Special Ed!"

_"Kirika…is dating InuYasha…in Special Ed_…"

"Whom are you talking about?" Kirika stood up from the seat. Inuyasha came in the room.

"Imposter! I'm in love with Kagome!" Inuyasha stammered. He stomped out of the room, a trail of jealous fan girls stalking him, and Kirika sighed as she sat back down.

"Are you quite finished yet?"

"_Of course not! Kirika…"_

"Does this have something to do with me in Special Ed?"

"_Wow, she's good…for a Special Ed Cross Dresser…"_

"I told you before I'm NOT IN SPECIAL ED!"

"_Then you're a cross dresser?"_

"Ugh…continue, do your worst…" Kirika sighed loudly as she slouched in the chair.

_"Ooh! That's my specialty! Kirika…has the theme song "Barbie Girl"…"_

"I don't care…that's not your worst…"

"_I mean the German version…_" 

"NO!"

_"Ha, I win! Kirika…sings the German Barbie Girl song…in Special Ed…"_

"Say Special Ed one more time and I'll transform into Nyx…"

"_Kirika…has—…"_

"Lunch Break!" I came in with a bunch of bags of McDonalds fatty goodies. Some guys grabbed cheeseburgers and snack wraps and I handed the mysterious voice a chocolate milkshake.

"_About time…ahem…where was I? Ah, yes! Kirika…has a Hannah Montana toothbrush_!"

"What?" Kirika stood up.

_"We have proof…Panda-Chan!"_

"Yes sir!" I came in with a blue Hannah Montana toothbrush, which played the song "Best of Both Worlds".

"That isn't mine!" Kirika karate chopped the toothbrush out of my grasp.

_"Then why does it say your name on it?"_

"BECAUSE IT DOESN'T!"

"_Kirika…brushes her teeth with her electric Hannah Montana toothbrush even though she is singing the German Barbie Girl song…in Special Ed…"_

"That's it! I've had it! NYX!" In just one second, Kirika transformed into Nyx and attacked the voice's milkshake and stormed out of the torture room from the back exit.

"Hey, do the closing, dude!" I said. But the voice was about to cry. His favorite milkshake flavor, splattered all over the room and covered with germs and dark goddess powers.

"SAY IT! SAY IT!"

"_Now you –sniff- know…-sniffle- Kirika Karasuma…WAAAAH!"_

"Um, it's only a milkshake…" I sweatdropped.

_**To be continued in chapter 6! MWAHAHAHA!**_

**Here are some of the chapters in the future! YAY!**

**Chapter Six- Michiru**

**Chapter Seven- Shi-Chan/Nike**

**Chapter Eight- Miyon**

**Chapter Nine- Yuuki**

**Chapter Ten- Kazusa**

**Chapter Eleven- Ami**

**Chapter Twelve- Q-Chan**

**Chapter Thirteen- The Kazune-Z**

**Chapter Fourteen- Michirians!**

**Chapter Fifteen- Jin**

**Chapter Sixteen- Himeka Karasuma**

**Chapter Seventeen- Auntie**

**Chapter Eighteen- Karin's Homeroom Teacher**

**Chapter Nineteen- Karin's friends from elementary school**

**Chapter Twenty- The two Punks that were ruining Kazune and Karin's "date"**

**Chapter Twenty-One- Panda-Chan**

….

SAY WHAT? ME?

**Who put me on the torture list?**

I did… 

**Voice?**

Nope… 

**Who?**

_**Mitch…**_

Oh…my…God… 

**); o**

**Boo-hoo…**


End file.
